Tuesday, May 25, 2010

And The Truth of the Matter Is.....

..... I am terrified.

And the more people that tell me that they do not agree with what I am doing, the more terrified I get. I'll confess that it is true. I am scared about what is about to happen to my life. I am walking out of Australia, back into Asia, but this time without a job, but with a heart and a camera. Of course I know that what I am doing is not the conventional road to take at my age.

But each time I hear "now is the time you should be settling down, getting money behind you, developing your career", it urges me on. It feeds my desire to take the road less travelled. Sure, I am scared. And those that are close to me are scared too, but its only because I have challenged the mould in which people so desperately wished to fit me. I come away from this "journey" and what will I have?

Is there any one of you out there who are just as interested as I am to find out what that "something" will be? A warmer heart? A better outlook on life? More compassion for the human race? I sure hope so.

I have no idea what I even need to pack. What do you need to pack when you really have no idea where you are going? Sure, I start in Bali, Indonesia and I spend two months living and learning about life in one of the outer villages, away from the tourist centre that we know to be Bali. Its amazing how we spend our entire lives accumulating material possessions, collecting things that we think we want, things that will provide us with what we think will be security, but when it all comes down to it, they are the very things I wish to turn by back on.

I truly feel as though the only things I need in my backpack this time around are a few clothes, my camera, my mobile phone, my passport, my few needed possessions like bank cards and identification, and then my laptop.

Yes, I am scared. Of course I am scared.

But like someone said to me the other day, in order to be brave, you have to be scared of something.


  1. Mobile phone? Laptop? Do you really think you need them? Just go and enjoy yourself. Forget about the rest of the world and just enjoy where you are at. I presume you are doing this because you want to live life with no regrets, and for that I admire your courage. But by taking your laptop and phone with you (which I presume is to keep in touch with what is happening in the world) you will be spending more time than really necessary in a virtual world, rather than living for the moment in the real world, which you will probably come to regret. I can assure you, you will not regret not knowing about an oil spill in Mexico, or political unrest in Thailand at the time it is happening, (which will only upset you anyway) but you will regret not seeing the local football team win the grand final, someone notable coming to town, and other such things which you tend to find out by word of mouth, because you were too busy with a phone to your ear, or your eyes fixed on your laptop screen while you are typing away telling everyone what you are doing.

    Go, enjoy yourself, and find some peace within, or whatever it is that you are seeking by doing this. When you have found it, or you have had enough, and want to go “home”, then go home. It doesn’t matter if that is in 10 days, 10 months or 10 years. You only have yourself to answer to.

    I would rather regret the things that I have done, than the things that I have not – Lucile Ball

  2. Another quote along the same lines, but with a bit more depth...

    Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

  3. Phone - safety, given I am travelling alone.

    Laptop - so I can download my photos, work on them on the photoshop and potentially sell them while on the road.

    Laptop - to blog and write about my experiences.

    But i get your point...

  4. I'll let you get away with taking them then... given the laptop may be a source of income to keep you out there longer!!

    When I was travelling I was stressed about (not) loosing my $200 camera which was my most expensive possession. I also didnt speak to anyone from 'home' for over 3 months!! How times have changed!! When I think back to where I was and how little I communicated with my parents, I cant imagine how worried they must have been! Oops!!

    Am sure you will be fine, and I do look forward to reading and viewing some of your adventures!!

    Best wishes xx

  5. I hope Kate contacts home more often than three months.
    There are at least two very important reasons why Kate needs to be able to communicate with home. These are both medical. Its hard enough that she is going again but at least this way we keep in touch. So to just go off and not care about her family, first of all, would be in Kates case very unwise.
    Ros Adams.

  6. Mum, I intend to contact you more often than once every three months. Besides, I shall be blogging every second day or so.

    I'm interested to know who "Anonymous" is....

    I can't place the writing style...

  7. I want to know who the heck is telling you they don't agree with you and is giving you boring advice! Sorry, but that is the kind of stuff you should NOT now or EVER listen to! It's your life, live it how you want to! Clarisa xo

  8. Do what you want to do, be what you want to be...

  9. I wasn't telling Kate to go so long without communicating from home - in fact I insinuated that in hindsight it was rather selfish of me to go so long without contacting my parents.

    My point to Kate was that she should just go out there and enjoy where she is at and the people she will meet, rather than worrying about what is going on in the rest of the world. I think Kate understood what I meant, and no doubt she already has that in mind.

  10. I do, Anon. Message received, loud and clear ;)

  11. I'd be worried about you, Kate, if you were not scared.

    I'll personally kick your arse if you don't follow your heart, and then (of course) share it with us in your blog and your photos! (^_^)