Sorry for not having blogged recently. I am in Australia.
I wish I could say that I am "home", but I don't feel like I am home. I feel like I've come and interrupted people's lives. I feel as lonely here as I do back in Singapore. I feel like a nomad. I feel like I don't belong anywhere. I feel like everyone has so much to do, and so little of it involves me. Have I pushed everyone aside so much that they no longer care for me?
I wonder whether this feeling will ever go away. Whether I will belong anywhere. Whether I will one day find peace somewhere. I wonder if stability is just a fantasy.
Thursday, December 17, 2009
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Hey, I care about you - A LOT - and I wish I was there to spoil you while you're at home.
ReplyDeleteYou know, I still feel the same way, and I've been back 'home' in Brissie for 6 years now. I get sad that I have so few friends and miss my Sydney crew. But when I visit Sydney - I never see anyone because I feel like I'm disturbing them. I'm an outsider in Singapore, and one in Australia too :)
Thank god for the internet, where I can connect with everyone, that's all I can say.
I don't have an answer...just wanted to let you know how loved you are.
Hugs
Clarisa xo