Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Ready To Talk About It....

I wont go into too much detail about what has happened over the last month or so. There are some details about my life that really are best left off the internet. However, I can explain to you there have been a couple of things which have made me realise that what I thought I believed what the right path in life really actually wasnt what I wanted after all.

Perhaps it came about knowing that my time to turn 30 was edging closer and closer.

Perhaps it came about because I reached a point of exhaustion.

Instead though, I would like to think that it happened after two particular instances.

Firstly, I visited Bali in October. I think that anyone who followed my blog at that time realised just how much Bali touched something inside of me that I could not explain. I tried to write about it in my blog entry called "Life So Empty But Love So Full", but I cant explain just how much that trip to Indonesia affected me. Something changed that day.


The second moment was when I was walking through Sydney Airport, after having left IMOM and my family behind me, ready to go back to Singapore. All of a sudden, I felt lonely, empty, robotic, exhausted and disassociated from everything around me.

I now have decided to dedicate the next twelve months to both volunteering in poverty stricken areas throughout Asia, dedicate time to advance and maybe sell some of my photography - and also achieve 30 challenges in the year of turning 30. Those 30 challenges may be big, they may be small, but over the next couple of months, as my 30th birthday nears, I will make that list. One of them will include the walk to Base Camp, Mount Everest, something I have always dreamed of doing but never believed I'd have the opportunity or time to do.

There is nothing scarier than waking up one day to realise that you are not the person you have the potential to be....

But I've chosen to feel the fear - and do it anyway.

3 comments:

  1. You Go Girl Ma x x x x

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  2. Everything will be okay...

    I'm proud of you.

    Clarisa xo

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  3. You're incredibly brave. What a gal! I follow your blog with huge admiration.

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